Friday, April 08, 2005

Report: You Can Fuck Off And Die

A new report says you can fuck off and die, you miserable bitch.

Compiled by the Centre for Our Relationship Studies, the report upholds recent claims that you are a lying slut, a sadistic cow, and that you smell like mouldy cheese. It concludes that we are through, baby, so don't expect to find me here when you get home from "drinks with the girls" after work.

Researchers believe this report will be the last word on the subject, and will refute an earlier study which claimed I was an abusive drunk with a small penis who cheats at Monopoly.


MrLefty said...

Very Onion. I love it.

Brownie said...

have you been reading