To: All members
From: The Institute of Journalistic Cliche
Subject: The 2006 Man Booker Prize
Kiran Desai's The Inheritance of Loss has been awarded the 2006 Booker Prize. IJC advises members reporting this story to follow the standard protocols; in particular, the IJC mandates the use of the adjectives "prestigious" and "esteemed", in addition to the verb "triumphed". The phrases "relative unknowns", "literary heavyweights" and "shock exclusion" are optional but recommended.
Furthermore, IJC directive #4253 states that: "Any article, opinion piece or blog post discussing Kiran Desai's Booker win must mention Desai's relative youth - she is the youngest woman to win the prestigious award - and her mother, the esteemed novelist Anita Desai. If you can squeeze in something about the continuing potency of Indian fiction, that would be good too."
Quotations ought to be used sparingly and with a preference for the hyperbolic. For example, John Sutherland provides a model of nonsensical verbiage: "Desai's novel registers the multicultural reverberations of the new millennium, with the sensitive instrumentality of fiction... It is a globalised novel for a globalised world."
Articles should end with a perfunctory mention of the usual criticism directed at the prize, and perhaps some suggestion that you, the journalist, have not fallen for the hype you have just spent five hundred words regurgitating. Australian members are reminded that mention of Peter Carey's "shock exclusion" is compulsory at this point.
IJC Administration OfficerCross-posted at Sars.