Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Reporting the Booker

To: All members

From: The Institute of Journalistic Cliche

Subject: The 2006 Man Booker Prize

Kiran Desai's The Inheritance of Loss has been awarded the 2006 Booker Prize. IJC advises members reporting this story to follow the standard protocols; in particular, the IJC mandates the use of the adjectives "prestigious" and "esteemed", in addition to the verb "triumphed". The phrases "relative unknowns", "literary heavyweights" and "shock exclusion" are optional but recommended.

Furthermore, IJC directive #4253 states that: "Any article, opinion piece or blog post discussing Kiran Desai's Booker win must mention Desai's relative youth - she is the youngest woman to win the prestigious award - and her mother, the esteemed novelist Anita Desai. If you can squeeze in something about the continuing potency of Indian fiction, that would be good too."

Quotations ought to be used sparingly and with a preference for the hyperbolic. For example, John Sutherland provides a model of nonsensical verbiage: "Desai's novel registers the multicultural reverberations of the new millennium, with the sensitive instrumentality of fiction... It is a globalised novel for a globalised world."

Articles should end with a perfunctory mention of the usual criticism directed at the prize, and perhaps some suggestion that you, the journalist, have not fallen for the hype you have just spent five hundred words regurgitating. Australian members are reminded that mention of Peter Carey's "shock exclusion" is compulsory at this point.

Regards,

Ron Leggat

IJC Administration Officer

Cross-posted at Sars.

4 comments:

TimT said...

I sometimes find when my posts slacken I can dig up an old piece/idea that I've scribbled down and use that as a blog post. It usually works, since I generally have a lot of discarded ideas lying around.

TimT said...

Hmmm, wrong post ... sorry about that!

Tim said...

Unfortunately we don't have that option. Between us Jon and I have only ever had 348 ideas and this post is number 348. We're pretty much screwed now.

TimT said...

I can't remember which post it was now, but you invented a name for a newspaper, 'The Kitchener Street Moustache', I somehow knew that the vein of rich comedy and invention that was Sternezine would never really be exhausted.

Sometimes the important thing is to keep writing, or even keep publishing.

You should do more posts about wholesome family-oriented subjects; like lies you've told to your children lately. John could contribute by chucking in another one of his whimsical mini-dramas about bogans administering oral sex on the train, or something of that nature. I know you can do it!